damn antidepressants

So, the Paxil is working. Yep, I'm slowly losing my major depressive episode criteria-meeting behavior. Don't worry though, I'm still psychotic; did you see that sentence? :)

Anyway, so not depressed. Here's the evidence:

• spontaneous cleaning, including vacuuming of floor
• laundry! I just spent an hour matching socks. Also, I folded the clothes and linens
• gathering of trash and actually taking it to the dumpster instead of hiding it on the balcony or in the bathtub
• paying of past due shit, I just gave the library $100 for late fees (and a book I said I lost, but just wanted to keep)

It's horrifying. But don't worry (again), very little has changed; there's no way in Hell that even several weeks of "not-depressed" can make up for years of "depressed". That said... who wants to help me move my old futon mattress out of the house and place it in the dumpster? I don't think I can manage it by myself.

I'm including a photo showing part of the apartment. That's my bed in its new position under the Joe Flanigan poster. It's not that creepy because I can't actually see him well when I'm lying down, but he stares at the back of my head when I'm on the computer. There's My Apprentice (I mean "Sarah Bray") on his new perch. And Oh My God! There's folded laundry in the middle of the bed.

ps

I'm feeling rather cheated. Mixed in with the socks were my bras and panties. Or maybe I should just say "bras and panties" and skip the "my". Now in my possesion are a pair of black Victoria's Secret Low Rise Bikinis (Made in Isreal) sized Small. Now, I'm not the largest woman I know, but my hips still don't fit in a small. Besides all the underwear I buy fall into two categories: period panties (ugly cotton full bottomed bikinis from Target, either white-ish or blue) and fantasy panties (sexy-ish cotton uncomfortable thongs and V-strings from VS, on clearance if I can find them). Actually both kinds can be considered fantasy panties because apparently several years ago I ran out of clean panties and just stopped wearing them after that. I think about wearing them, but every time I try to restart the habit the period panties give me wedgies and the sexy panties start as wedgies (which I expect and accept) then start sawing me in half. So anyway, I've been cheated because:

1. I don't fit in these little panties even though they're sitting at my house like they're mine
2. some chick forgot her panties at my house and I didn't even get a little making out, let alone full hot lesbian sex

This just goes to show that I really really need to clean (now and a Hell of a lot more often). The only person who could have left these panties here was a house guest back in APRIL. Do I ask her if they're hers so just toss them?

my workplace

I've been meaning to snap a picture of the horror at is my workplace for over a year now. Under cover of darkness I got this photo about two weeks ago. I've just managed to smuggle it out. Yes, those are faces! If you look closely you'll notice the slaughter included adults, children and even infants. Oh, the horror!

poetry

I'm writing. Wow, I'm writing! It feels good. Two new poems in a week and I think they are good. They're rather different from what I usually write, so that was a bit unsettling. You can find my new poems here.

more news

I've had a very busy... some period of time.

One, I'm menstruating. I called my boss' cell at 330a last night to say I might not come to work because I was really hurting. But I made it to work anyway.

Two, I signed up for allpoetry.com. I'm kittensushi there. Read my poems and bow down, bitches! Um, I mean, gentle readers. Also I'm co-hosting a contest so you can enter it for points.

Three, I'm drinking Dr. Pepper... I forgot the real number three. No wait! I'm going to play more at Sissy Fight. It's fun; go there.

More: I bought a steamer basket so can now eat lots of artichokes to big to fit in the little electric steamer... T's in Mexico persuing something called relaxation... I'd consider being some guy's second wife if he was well, Joe Flanigan... Jessica lost 3lbs by skipping soda and not eating after eight pm.

ps
I took an IQ test last night. I scored 143 on it; I'm a genius.

letter to kmart

Dear Kmart,

Your stores are filthy and even when your sales associates speak English, they are very much less than helpful. Nevertheless, I would like to thank you for my new loafers. They are surprisingly comfortable and not as ugly as most of your merchandise. I have walked to and from work in them and am impressed with the quality so far. Thank you for a decent pair of shoes.

Lexa

ps
Try harder to please me next time; I have no intention of paying retail and having to settle for a half size too big again.

damn unlucky me

Some hoochie, really really rich hoochie, has beaten me into space as the first female space tourist. Damn her! Damn the Japanese guy who's place she took! Damn the bastard who runs Powerball Lottery and keeps making me lose (the times I have tickets)!

I'd also like to damn my very disorganized gay friends for having delayed selling me their old computer (for like a year now) and thus making it so I can't play Sims 2 at home. I've exacted part of my revenge by sneezing on their new computer's keyboard 4 times.

ps
The mucus from my right nostril is tinged with blood; how bad is that?